After my last blog post, I really struggled with what to write next, our son’s birth mom did an amazing job sharing her heart and I really wasn’t sure how to follow it. So, I put off writing for a few days but an idea kept coming to mind earlier this week and today, so I feel that maybe there is a reason I need to write what I write today….
When my husband and I first announced to those around us we were adopting, we realized we were more connected to a world of adoptive parents, those who’ve been adopted, and birth parents than we ever imagined. It has really been wonderful to see how adoption has touched so many lives. In the process of sharing our story with others, we have been able to have open dialogue with those just thinking about adoption. In these discussions, I talk with people at all points in the journey to parenthood and want to share the very basic information I’ve shared with them.
Grief and Loss: I hope I don’t scare anyone away, but this is important. Not everyone who adopts has fertility issues and not everyone with fertility issues adopts. But if, like my husband and I, infertility led you to consider adoption sooner than you thought, you’ll need to address it. In order to be ready to adopt, you need to be in a place emotionally to do so. The “funny” thing about grief is that it never really truly goes away, and it brings on a journey of ups and downs, and that’s putting it lightly. Adoption in itself is a process grief and loss in its own way and until you’ve come to terms with prior grief, you just won’t be ready. This topic in itself deserves its own post, and I plan to write one in the very near future. If you have questions, email me, and lets talk.
Research, Research, Research: Adoption can be very different depending on the route you take and the professionals you work with. You need to know all your options, be able to make educated decisions, and make sure the right people are helping you on your adoption journey. One of the reasons I started a blog is because I knew how much reading blogs of other adoptive families helped me. Research cost, types of adoption, openness in adoption, etc. Research local agencies and adoption consultants. Research grants and fundraising ideas.